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\n\t\tOpinions expressed by Entrepreneur contributors are their own.\t<\/p>\n
One of the most expensive mistakes leaders make is waiting too long to have a conversation they knew they needed to have.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve watched it happen over and over again. A leader notices something small. Maybe an employee keeps submitting reports in a format that creates extra work. Maybe someone has started showing up late to meetings or has developed a habit of interrupting coworkers. The leader notices it, tells themselves they\u2019ll bring it up later, and moves on.<\/p>\n
Days become weeks. Weeks become months. By the time the conversation finally happens, it\u2019s no longer about one small issue. It\u2019s about frustration, assumptions and a long list of examples the employee never knew were adding up.<\/p>\n
Most team problems become major issues because no one addressed them while they were still small. That\u2019s why I live by what I call the \u201csay it sooner\u201d rule.<\/p>\n
Most leaders avoid these conversations because they care deeply about their employees. They don\u2019t want to hurt their feelings. They don\u2019t want to create conflict or make the workplace uncomfortable. They convince themselves the problem will work itself out or that maybe it isn\u2019t a big enough deal to mention.<\/p>\n
Unfortunately, silence sends its own message.<\/p>\n
When employees don\u2019t receive feedback, they assume they\u2019re meeting expectations. I\u2019ve worked with enough teams to know that most people genuinely want to do a good job. If no one tells them otherwise, they naturally believe they\u2019re doing exactly what they\u2019re supposed to be doing. Meanwhile, the leader quietly grows more frustrated, often venting to everyone except the person who could actually fix the problem.<\/p>\n
I often tell leaders that we accidentally put people on invisible performance improvement plans. We\u2019re mentally documenting every mistake while the employee has no idea they\u2019re even being evaluated. Then one day we finally have the conversation, and they\u2019re completely blindsided. That\u2019s simply poor communication, not kindness.<\/p>\n
One idea I come back to often is that it\u2019s our job to teach people how to love us. That applies in relationships, and it applies in leadership.<\/p>\n
Think about it. If I never tell you what success looks like, how can I be frustrated when you miss it? If I don\u2019t explain how I prefer communication, how projects should be organized or what quality looks like to me, I\u2019m asking you to guess. Then, when your guess doesn\u2019t match my expectations, I blame you for getting it wrong.<\/p>\n
That\u2019s not fair to the other person.<\/p>\n
One of the greatest gifts a leader can give is clarity. The sooner people understand what\u2019s expected, the sooner they can meet those expectations. Delaying feedback doesn\u2019t protect people. It delays their growth.<\/p>\n
The good news is that early feedback doesn\u2019t have to be formal or intimidating. In my experience, about 90% of these conversations can happen naturally if we stop treating them like disciplinary meetings.<\/p>\n
First, address the behavior, not the person. Focus on what happened instead of assigning motives. \u201cI noticed the spreadsheet was submitted in a different format than we agreed on,\u201d lands much better than \u201cYou\u2019re careless.\u201d<\/p>\n
Second, create clarity together. Instead of assuming someone understands your expectations, ask questions. \u201cCan we walk through what success looks like?\u201d or \u201cWhat would help make this easier next time?\u201d Those questions create collaboration instead of defensiveness.<\/p>\n
Third, end with confidence. I want people leaving the conversation believing they can succeed, not wondering if they\u2019re failing. A simple \u201cI know you can do this, and I wanted to tell you now instead of letting it become a bigger issue\u201d completely changes the tone. You\u2019re investing in their growth rather than finding problems to pick at.<\/p>\n
One of the biggest myths about leadership is that honest feedback damages trust. In my experience, the opposite is true.<\/p>\n
People lose trust when they discover you\u2019ve been holding onto concerns you never shared. They lose trust when they hear about problems through gossip instead of directly from their leader. They lose trust when small frustrations suddenly appear during an annual review, even though no one mentioned them all year.<\/p>\n
I\u2019ve also seen the opposite happen. I once had an employee pull me aside to share a perspective I couldn\u2019t see on my own. Underneath the initial critical feedback, I saw that she was helping me understand her experience. That conversation changed the way I led, and I still think about her courage. She said it sooner instead of allowing resentment to build, and because she did, our relationship became stronger, not weaker.<\/p>\n
We can create stronger relationships and teams by simply normalizing uncomfortable conversations.<\/p>\n
If you struggle with addressing issues early, build one simple habit into your leadership routine.<\/p>\n
At the end of every week, ask yourself these three questions:<\/p>\n
If someone\u2019s name immediately comes to mind, that\u2019s usually your answer. Have smaller conversations immediately rather than allowing small issues to turn into more difficult conversations.<\/p>\n
Every leader has conversations they\u2019d rather avoid. I\u2019ve certainly had mine. But I\u2019ve learned that waiting almost never makes those conversations easier. It simply gives frustration more time to grow.<\/p>\n