We’re in the midst of a child care crisis in America, but when fathers want to take on more childcare to equal their partners’ efforts, they are being stymied by their employers.
Max, who requested to go by a pseudonym, spent 15 years as a contractor: no benefits, little job security, and frequent change. When recruited for a full-time role, he was upfront about his wife’s pregnancy and his need to take parental leave when their first-born child was due.
“I said, ‘I’m going to be flexible—I don’t have to take off right away and I can do it in stints.’ I was offering these different plans because it was important to me for the company to be successful,” Max says. “The recruiter said ‘Don’t even worry about it. Take your leave, and the company policy is 16 weeks.’”
When Max accepted the job offer, this flexibility evaporated. A company representative told him, “Sorry for the misinformation you received, but this is our policy and we will not be making an exception.” They’ve held firm on this stance in the months that followed, leaving him with a combination of vacation and sick days to use once his child is born.
Currently, the average annual cost associated with daycare sat at $15,570 in 2025, and 1.3 million workers (89% being women) report having to work part-time or miss work entirely due to childcare problems.
Yet paternity policies—and workplace taboos—are leaving men without the flexibility to take leave when it’s offered. Only 17% of Fortune 500 companies offer equal leave to mothers and fathers; even when they do, dads are often discouraged from taking it all.
Both stigmas and stingier policies for fathers make it hard for some dads to step away. Getting approval is riddled with bureaucratic traps, managerial pressure, subverted gender roles, and unspoken consequences. Men are ready to step up, but employers aren’t ready to let them.
