Our features editor believes that a professional baseball game could be tweaked to reflect the staff cuts, budget woes, and overcrowding that national parks have endured amid two years of disastrous policy changes
NOT REAL! This image was made with AI. (Photo: Google Gemini)
Published September 28, 2026 01:52PM
Should America’s Favorite Pastime and America’s Best Idea be tossed into a blender and served to us like a bizarre cultural smoothie?
It’s the question that fans of U.S. national parks and of Major League Baseball (MLB) must contemplate this week. On September 26, reporters Jake Spring and Stephanie Apstein of The Washington Post broke the news that MLB recently approached the Trump Administration about hosting a professional baseball game within the boundaries of a national park.
The WaPo tory said that the Trump Administration is taking the ask seriously. In fact, administration officials recently scouted three potential sites within Wyoming’s Grand Teton National Park to build a baseball park for the game, according to the outlet. The WaPo story likened the game to the MLB’s August 13 Field of Dreams event—the league constructed a makeshift park in an Iowa cornfield that hosted a game between the Philadelphia Phillies and Minnesota Twins, a la the 1989 Kevin Costner film. The WaPo story did not divulge what blueprints, if any, exist to build a baseball stadium in a national park, and whether or not the construction would destroy threatened habitat, kill endangered species, or plow up areas of cultural significance.
Those of us who love national parks, no doubt, reacted to this development by conjuring up the same image in our minds. That, of course, is of Dodgers slugger Shohei Ohtani belting a monstrous home run that ricochets off the 13,775-foot summit of the Grand Teton, soars over Jenny Lake, and bonks a grizzly bear near Mormon Row.
The likelihood of his happening is, of course, extremely slim. Very few baseball players, even Ohtani, can hit a home run that far. And also, the Trump Administration poured a few drops of cold water on the whole MLB game in a national park project with a statement it released to the WaPo.
“This is not a Presidential directive, nor is it being directed by the White House. It’s also not being driven by the Department of Interior,” the statement says. “Therefore, this is not a White House or Administration priority.”
Look, I’m not much of a baseball fan, nor do I think a professional sporting event should be held on public land.
Still, I do see some value in staging a stunt like this: an MLB game represents the perfect opportunity to show the wider American public exactly how we’ve been treating our national parks over the past two years. If you’ve read Outside, then you probably know about the budget cuts, staff shortages, long lines, snitch hotline, diverted funds, proposed land swaps, and other destructive policies that our national parks are enduring.
In my vision, MLB tweaks the rules of baseball to reflect the recent National Park Service changes, which in turn could help our fellow Americans truly understand what is at stake with these destructure policies. I propose the game take place between America’s team, the New York Yankees, and the sad sack club that best represents the beleaguered state of the NPS: the forever slumping Colorado Rockies.
Here are a few ideas for how to operate the MLB x national park mashup, pulled from the real issues facing the NPS in 2026 and beyond.
- Oh no! After an unorthodox land swap, second base has been relocated to the parking lot.
- Ack! The Rockies outfielders took early retirement buyouts. Please welcome seasonal backups from nearby Jackson Hole High School.
- We fired the groundskeepers. Don’t worry—Yankees first baseman Ben Wright and reliever David Bednar will mow the lawn.
- Alas, 45 percent of the Yankees payroll has been diverted to the Washington Nationals.
- Snitch signs encourage fans to report anyone booing.
- Slightly edited MLB history books now list Babe Ruth and Jim Thome as No. 1 and No. 2 for all-time home runs.
- Whaddya mean the men’s bathroom is out of service? Don’t worry, we’re forcing it to remain open and accessible.
- Players hoping to reach third base are encouraged to take the unmarked shortcut across the pitching mound. If the umpires give them any static, they are likely to receive a full pardon.
- The ballpark capacity may say 1,500 people, but officials encourage anyone and everyone and his or her cousin to show up all at the same time.
- Construction crews are erecting a series of barriers, fences, and “detection technology” near third base, so that nobody can ever sneak to home.
- Fans are encouraged to forget about Disco Demolition Night, Spider Man 2 promotional bases, the Montreal Expos, and other “corrosive” moments in baseball history.
- Seat assignments and all forms of reservations are now canceled.
- Ticket prices are still $25. Well, unless you’re visiting from overseas. If so, you’ll pay double.
